Sweden is not the United States, part 342

I was out last week with a friend, and he went into a convenience store to buy a subway ticket. And there I was, faced with this magazine rack.

Notice the Pappa Magazine in the top right. I wrote about Pappa last month, and even though I noticed its minor buzz online, I never thought it would actually get such major play on newsstands.

How far away do you think the first glossy “Daddy” magazine is in the US? 20, 30 years?

Tags: fatherhood, magazine, masculinity, pappa, parenting, publishing, Sweden

From the sun to the snow … looking back after the jet lag

This is where we were.

Though it could be windy.

Mostly glorious, especially in January.

And now back to this.  That poor kid falling down says it all.  Except that my kids had just spent 20 minutes falling down on purpose and screaming with laughter about it.  So all is not gloomy when you get fresh snow on your return from the beach …

Tags: beach, California, Children, fatherhood, parenting, photography, Sweden, travel, winter

My apologies to the good people at the Seattle airport

So I complained about the lack of play areas for kids at airports. But I had never been to Seattle, where they have this heaven for small children. We had a four hour layover and it saved us.

So between Stockholm and Seattle, we encountered two wonderful playgrounds.

Which leaves no excuses for all the other slackers. And, yes, I am looking at you Oakland.

Tags: airport, Children, Seattle, Stockholm, travel

In praise of playing – and play areas – at airports

We fly off tomorrow on a three-flight, 24-hour odyssey back to Sweden.   We do this sort of thing often enough.  And I have just two words for airports worldwide:  play area.

We stumbled upon on our first play area in Salt Lake City a few years ago, and it was like a gift from the heavens, with a big choir singing and everything.  Since then, we discovered a shabby one in Chicago, which likely saved us and hundreds of people on a series of airplanes from a toddler meltdown.

Seriously, why does not every airport have play areas?  All people do is complain about small kids on planes.  Why not give them a place to have fun before they get on board.  Why not get them out of the waiting areas?

A few weeks ago, in Stockholm, E and I wondered why the Stockholm airport had no play area.   It seemed thoughtless and odd.

Then we  found this, based on the work of a beloved early 20th-century children’s book illustrator Elsa Beskow:

 

Seriously, you could charge for this collaboration with Junibacken, a cool children’s museum in Stockholm, which opened in 2011.  It could be an attraction.  We might come early next time around.

Why is this sort of thing so hard?

Let us play, let us play, let us play.

Tags: airports, arlanda, children's literature, Daddy, elsa beskow, fatherhood, junibacken, parenting, Stockholm, travel

Signs that gender equality got off track sometime about 1980

This is a book that my parents read to me when I was a kid.  Now on a visit, I am reading it to my kid.

You read the first half about a dad out with his son, and then you flip it over and read about a mom out with her daughter.  They meet in the living room in the middle.

And you know what strikes me, besides the cool gimmick?  That the Dad is equal to the Mom.  Not just in having half a book, but in the tone and substance of the book.  He comforts his son when he gets hurt, helps him deal with fears and just in general was competent to deal with the average weekend outing.

And the mom?  She is basically the same, not scared of lions at the zoo and that sort of thing.

If a book like this came out today, I would praise it for being so forward thinking on gender stereotypes.

Then I just read a post at Dadding, the fatherhood blog at Babble, on LEGO advertising and how the toys used to be for boys and girls but somehow became only for boys.

And I think about how in Sweden the girls toys are getting pinker and girlier, without even any of the middle ground that American girls get (clothes and attitudes are still different there, yes).

Some pretty sad backsliding.

Tags: books, children's literature, fatherhood, gender neutral, gender roles, Lego, masculinity, parenting, Sesame Street

One of the crowd in a California playground

I feel special in Sweden.  I also often feel alone at the park or in the preschool dressing room.  But I also feel special.  I hug my kids a little more, am a little louder, don’t make them wear their snowsuit every afternoon, swing them in big circles and talk both to them and to myself as I hunt for the lost mitten (and there is always a lost  mitten).

We went to a park today here in northern California.  And it was filled with dads.  And it was filled Americans.  And, even though this happens every time we come to California, or I hang out with American dads in Sweden, it dawned on me that I am not special at all.

I mean, I’m sure I’m special and unique and will get a trophy at some point.  But  it is a good reminder to see all these guys taking care of their kids, to see all these parents talking like I do and playing like I do.

It’s not that American parenting is better.  It’s not.  It’s not worse either.

And it is both good and bad to feel part of the crowd.

It was good today.

Tags: California, Daddy, fatherhood, parenting, Sweden

A painful intersection of technology and Daddyland

After five years of baby and toddler carrying, my arm hurts.  I think I wrote about this long ago, and I hoped it would be better by now, but my three year old still wants to be held and to climb up my shoulder when he gets shy.  And while I could stop it, I’m sure, I don’t want to, both for my son’s sake and for my own, even if my left arm feels limp and useless except when I reach up to pick him up when it magically does not hurt.

Go figure.  Must be a parent thing.

Anyway, the arm was manageable – and I will stop carrying him at some point – until I got a smartphone.  It turns out that I hold the smartphone at an angle that matches my child-carrying one.

So after I have checked my e-mail or surfed the web or texted someone, my arm hurts even more than it does when carrying Baby B.

Maybe it’s a message to disconnect …